Book suggestion: Finding Awareness: The Journey of Self-discovery: https://amzn.to/3vAR2z2
Why do you do the things that you do? What triggers you and why does it trigger you? Do you know who you are and why? Most of us think that we know ourselves well, but this is not as common as we think. According to Merriam Webster, self-awareness is awareness of one’s own personality or individuality. (Merriam Webster). In order to become self-aware, please consider the following tips.
Self-Reflect
Journaling is a great way to self-reflect. You write in your journal consistently. Then, go back and read what you wrote about a week or even a month later. What thoughts did you write down? “Why did you think this way at the time? In the moment, we may feel a certain way. However, when time passes, we can look at the situation with new eyes.
You can assess situations that occur in your life, positive and negative situations. How did you handle the situation? Be objective about your actions. If you have a conflict with someone, the other person may have been in the wrong. If you handled it in an unhealthy way, reflect on why you did this. Ask yourself, “Why did this trigger me?”. Get to know yourself like you would get to know a close friend or spouse.
Recognize Strengths & Weakness
We all have strengths and weaknesses. Sometimes, we only focus on the tangible qualities, such as being organized, or having a talent in the performing arts. Strengths and weaknesses also involve you character traits. We all have unique personality qualities. A weakness can always be improved and a strength can always be improved as well. You are in charge of your personal growth.
If you want to become better in an area, work at it. All of us can learn to be better if we invest time to become better, through our daily actions. For example, if you are a naturally shy person, you can actively work on your communication skills. Learn to ask open ended questions. Work in customer service to help you interact with more people more frequently. You will probably always be a bit shy, but you can always work to improve on your communication skills.
Reflect on Criticism from Others
Criticism can be a taboo word in our society. Constructive cricitism is a great way to build personal growth and self-awareness. Crticism coming from a neagtive place does not usually lead to your growth. Learn to discern the difference between the two types of criticism by considering the source giving you the criticism. Sometimes constructive criticism can hurt quite a bit.
Pay attention to how you feel when you hear criticism, whether constructive or not. Self-reflect, “Is there merit to what was said?”; “Is this an area that I can improve?”. If we are honest, most of us would say we do not need to improve. Yes, you can accept yourself as you are. But personal growth is a must in order to deal with the ups and downs of life. Self-awareness can give you a leg up during extremely difficult circumstances that are beyond your control.
Consider the Feelings of Other People
When you are self-aware, you can empathize with other people’s feelings. Someone may be upset and you do not understand. However, you can give that person their space with no judgement. You know that all feelings are valid. There were times when you were upset, people didn’t understand, and you probably wished someone would have validated your feelings.
When you are self-aware, you become accustomed to acknowledging how you feel without judging your own feelings. Our feelings are not good or bad. However, how we express our feelings can cause us to make poor choices that effect others. There is nothing wrong with any feelings no matter how big or small the issue. When you are aware of what makes you feel a certain way, you can advise other people on dealing with difficult feelings.
Read Personal Development Books
Reading personal development books can be a life changer. Why? Successful writers, speakers, entrepreneurs now know who they are, but this was not always the case. Listening or reading about someone’s life or life choices can inspire you to work on your own personal growth. You would need to read or listen to these books regularly for this to be effective long term. I suggest immersing yourself in an audiobook or reading a book 15 minutes a day. These 15 minutes can make a difference in motivating you to get to know your self.
https://bydominiqueduarte.com/best-books-to-begin-personal-development/
Conclusion
Often, we walk through life on autopilot and we are not attuned to ourselves, or our needs and our wants. Sidenote: gaining self-wareness and discovering who you are is not selfish. When you are working toward healing, you can effectively influence other people in a positive way.
Selfish people do not usually have self-awareness. They can only see the world through their own narrative. They usually do not take criticism well, and refuse to become more enlightened on their feelings and actions. Becoming self-aware is one of the greatest gifts that you can give yourself and the world. I hope you find this within yourself.
Hope this helps,
Dominique Duarte
What are your strengths and weaknesses? Comment below!
Cited Work: “Self-awareness.” Merriam-Webster.com Dictionary, Merriam-Webster, https://www.merriam-webster.com/dictionary/self-awareness. Accessed 3 Aug. 2022.