Categories
New York City Life

What Do We Love and Hate about NYC?

19 Best Places to Take Pictures in New York City (Photo Guide)

After living in NYC, I have learned that people either love it or hate it here. There is rarely ever a neutral take from native New Yorkers or transplants from other states or countries. There are always plenty of jobs, tons of walking for exercise, and you can travel anywhere, anytime of day or night. The down side is New Yorkers are always working, which can lead to loneliness at times, the food is tempting and cancels out the walking, and rent is very high.

Pro: Jobs Are Abundant

Jobs are abundant in NYC! You can do jobs that you never knew existed. You can work at the Waldorf, Disney Store, Yankee Stadium, Jazz at Lincoln Center, Javits Center, Lincoln Center, Barclays Center, Madison Square Garden, Apollo Theatre, Brooklyn Botanical Gardens. The list never ends! You want a job or career, you can find it within a matter of weeks, just use Indeed.com. Whatever your career or job of choice, you can and will find it here.

Best Job Search Website: https://www.indeed.com/

https://www.bydominiqueduarte.com/the-best-ways-to-find-a-job/

Con: New Yorkers are Workaholics/ Loneliness

Since there are some many jobs and the cost of living is high, most people are working mulitple jobs or working overtime at their full-time jobs to sustain a living. Socializing and making friends can be challenging. People are always busy and coordinating schedules is difficult.

Even if you have several friends, you will rarely see them. In order to spend time with friends, you have to be very intentional about making plans with people. You can try joining an organization that interests you to socialize more. You can go out with friends from work, or use meetup.com to find your tribe.

Pro: Built in Excercise Routine: Walking

You will walk all day everyday, run after busses and trains, go up and down several subway steps daily. Even if you have a car, you will be parking extremely far from your home or job. You will need to have comfortable shoes. You will wear down every pair that you own within a matter of weeks.

Walking is my form of daily exercise and if you live here, it becomes a part of you daily routine as well. NYC has nice scenery and can be quiet in most neighborhoods, if you are not in Times Square or certain parts of Manahttan. The sirens can be loud sometimes, but you will hear live music often while walking down the street, which is pretty cool.

Con: FOOD, FOOD, FOOD

This is a bit of a pro/con. There is food on every corner in food trucks, bodegas (local grocery shops), grocery stores, ice cream shops, restaurants with food from all around the world. This a what makes NYC unique, the variety of food choices.

However, overeating and overspending is super easy with so many food choices. The abundance of food may interfere with the built in exercise routine of walking everywhere. Cooking at home will save you money and help your waistline too. So plan your meals accordingly and pack a lunchbox!

Pro: You Don’t Need a Car

NYC is one of the only cities that you can get around 24/7 without having a car. I sold my car almost 7 years ago and I have not driven since. You can get a monthly subway/bus pass for $127 a month and get wherever, whenever you want. You will need to give yourself plenty of travel time to get to your destination because the trains and busses are not very timely. But, you save so much money by not having a car. There will be no more car insurance, car payments, and you will not have to worry about high gas prices anymore.

Con: Affordable Housing is ‘No Bueno’

Get ready to throw the money you saved on not having car to your new NYC apartment. Wooohoo! You have more money to pay the rent now so it all evens out. Manhattan is way more expensive than Brooklyn, Queens and the Bronx, so I never looked for housing in Manhattan. I found affordable housing through Facebook markeptlace and Roomster.com.

You can search for rooms and go visit the apartments to see if you like the room. Bring a friend to be safe if you want. Discuss the deposit, broker’s fee, 1st month’s rent with the landlord, give them the money and move in as soon as possible. Be ready to put quite a bit of money down on an apartment. It is usually around $1500-3000 down, but this is about how much money you would put down on a new car anyway. You win some, you lose some.

Conclusion

High Rent and workaholism scares many people from NYC. However, NYC has so much to offer as well. You win some, you lose some! If you want to buy a home and have a family, this would not be the ideal place to live. However, if you are single or a couple with no children who doesn’t mind a minimialist lifestyle, this is the place for you.

You will not have the luxuries of elevators, washers and dryers in your apartment and large closets or even central heating and air, but you learn how to live with less, which can be a blessing in its’ own way.

Rent is high, but the jobs pay well and the opportunties for jobs are out of this world. You will find foods from around the world and you can walk around your neighborhood or a park and see gorgeous scenery. You can find friends here. Native New Yorkers are the most genuine people that I have ever met. Lastly, NYC is not for everyone and for some it is only good for a season in their life, but NYC is my home and currently I love it here, the pros and cons!

Hope this helps!

Dominique Duarte

What do you Love or Hate about NYC? Comment below!

Categories
Self-Help on Life

In Your Thirties, Now What?

Reaching your thirties can be quite a miletsone. Easily embraced by some, feared by others, but life changing for everyone. I have learned that comparing yourself to others is counterproductive to personal growth. Health insurance is necessary for life at this point, and you will not know all the answers. I have been in my thirties since November 2020, and this is what I have learned so far!

Comparing Yourself to Others is ‘No Bueno’

Social Media may have made this more of an issue for most of us because we see the pictures, and the posts and we think “why am I the only one who doesn’t have my life together?” I have thought it often and I wonder if there was no social media, would I be thinking so much about what others are doing.

Comparing Yourself to others is ‘no bueno’! It takes away from your unique journey and puts other people’s lives on a pedastal. No one has a perfect life and we all have our own struggles so be okay with your journey in life and do not be attached to a time limit. Everyone has their time to shine and your day will come, just work hard and be patient. YOU GOT THIS!

Health Insurance is Essential at This Point

Health Insurance may have felt more optional in your twenties because most twenty-somethings are generally in great health. Of course there are exceptions to this for sure. However, once you reach your thirties your body is going to change and even the smallest health issues will begin to show up.

Having health insurance will make things easier if you have to go to the doctor for any reason. The insurance cuts the cost of any doctor visit, surgery, or medication. It also keeps you from avoiding the doctor and making the problem worse by not seeking medical help in a timely manner. Taking care of yourself in your thirties is a great time to start taking your health more seriously if you have not already been doing this.

You Will Not Know All the Answers

This can be a hard pill to swallow, especially if you are a perfectionist. You feel as if you must know everything to be successful in life. It is okay to not know everything. Life is about continuing to learn about yourself, other people, and the world around you.

If you believe in having faith, true faith is not always knowing the final outcome of every situation. Plans and goals are important, but continue to be open to changes as well. I used to think that I needed to know everything to prove my worth to others, and still struggle with this at times. Give yourself grace!

Conclusion

Your thirties are here! Congrats and enjoy these years! We all know that our twenties came and went quite quickly so cherish your thirites. When you make sure you have health insurance, know that you will not know all the answers to everything, and stop comparing yourself to other people, you will learn to love and appreciate the amazingly unique journey that you are on and embrace it fully, even on the challenging days.

Hope this helps,

Dominique Duarte

Book Suggestion: Reinventing your Life:https://www.amazon.com/Reinventing-Your-Life-Breakthrough-Negative/dp/0452272041

https://www.bydominiqueduarte.com/how-to-wait-patiently/

Categories
Self-Help on Life

How to Make Friends in Adulthood

36 quotes about the power & importance of adult friendships - Stitch

One of the hardest things about becoming an adult has been the persistent feeling of loneliness. When you are a child, teen, or young adult, making friends is easier throughout primary school and college. However, once you graduate college, it becomes more difficult to make friends in adulthood. People get married, begin careers and jobs and have families, so making time for friends takes more of an effort for sure. Here are some of the things that I have tried to help make and keep friends throughout my time in NYC.

Maintain Old Friendships

Keeping and maintaining friendships is the best place to start. Instead of trying to make a bunch of new friends, try maintaining and rekindling some old friendships. Think about all of the people who have come into your life and figure out who brought positivity into your life when you were in their presence. Ask yourself “Who brings joy?” “Who do I have or could have a frientimacy with?” According to Shasta Nelson, CEO of GirlFriendCircles.com, a frientimacy includes positivity, vulnerability, and consistency.

Write down everyone in your contact list and figure out whether you have these three elements with your current contacts. Consistency was lacking with most of the contacts in my phone, so, I began texting one person a day to check in or send a positive message. Writing “Text 1 person” in the planner has helped me remain consistent with this habit for over a year now. We all get busy, but making time for friends has to be intentional and it starts with you.

Shasta Nelson discusses “Frientimacy” in the video below. Enjoy! https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hmJyWreER7A

Find a Community

Finding a community is more challenging now than it was back in the day for all of us. Social media has made us more disconnected than ever. Finding a community was always the most difficult for me, even in school. I never really had a group of friends until I went to college, and gained some friends as an adult through musical productions over the years.

Try to get involved in a church, or any organzation that interests you, or find co-workers or people who have things in common with you. There are communities out there, but you have to take the first step if you want to socialize more. People will not come visit you in your room at home, so push yourself out of your comfort zone.

Church has given me a community in Memphis and even in NYC. However, it takes time to build intimate connections, even at church, so be patient. Reach out to people and even though not everyone will take the bait, the people who are meant to be in your life will, so just give it time.

Work on Your Personal Growth

Examine yourself and always work toward self-improvement. Yes, accept yourself for who you are at the moment, but also challenge yourself to work on unhealthy coping mechanisms, and work toward healthy communication. This is not easy work, but it is worth it and it will be continuous.

Friendships gives you practice to work on improving your communication skills. Sometimes, you will have tough conversations with friends. In order to have intimacy in a friendship, there has to be transparency by both parties. Therapy is a great way to work on yourself as well as journaling. Therapy is not just for people with big problems, it is for people to become self-aware. You have to be a friend to keep a friend. So learn to be the best you that you can be.

https://www.bydominiqueduarte.com/best-books-to-begin-personal-development/

Conclusion

Maintaining old friendships, finding a community, and working on your personal growth can help increase friendship in your life if that is what you desire. Also, try to meet up with a friend once a week or once a month. Consistency does mean something different to everyone so figure out what consistency means to you.

Find out what consistency means to each of your friends as well. You can make friends and keep friends, just put in a little effort. Lastly, sometimes people will not reciprocate, but do not get discouraged. If you reach out to multiple people those you want to be your friend will reach out eventually, just be patient and give people grace.

Hope this helps,

Dominique Duarte

Categories
Work & Jobs

Do We Compromise in Our Line of Work?

Pin by Caryn James on c r e a t i v e | Earl nightingale, Nightingale,  Knowledge and wisdom

“The opposite of courage in our society is not cowardice. It is conformity.” -Earl Nightingale

Society loves to tell you which jobs are the best and the worst and why. Social media and the internet post articles all the time about this subject. Your own family and friends will inadvertently tell you their own prejudices about certain jobs. Who do you listen to? To compromise or not to compromise, that is the question?

Jobs & Career Prejudice

We all have a tendency to look down on some jobs and romanticize other jobs. The people who work at the job make the difference, not the job or career itself. For example, if you work in a service job, the assumption is that you must have made a mistake or lost your way. If you are a teacher, people will remember their own educational experience, which leads them to either demonize education, or overromanticize your job role.

Other people view you as almost angelic for doing such a selfless act as teaching young students. In the arts, singers, musicians, artists, dancers and entertainers are viewed as glamourous, talented or pompous and self absorbed, if they are successful. When the success dies down, they are villainized. If they self destruct, it was because they chose such a horrible career choice. Or, if you are trying to make it and have not had instant success, then you are wasting your life. If someone makes it, then they were just lucky, no hard work was involved along the way, it was only their pure talent that got them to the top.

Why Are You Showing Up for Work

Are you doing the job with integrity and honoring your true self? Or are you giving a subpar performance just to get a paycheck? Do you give 100 percent and still feel unfufilled in your work? When we choose to compromise, we give up our true callings to win societal approval and avoid discomfort financially. You can be whatever you want to be in life. If it is legal, of course.

Unfortunately, some people do find ways to do illegal things within legal jobs and careers. Go figure! However, most of us choose a practical career or job in order to have stability. We settle! We settle to fit in, to not stand out, to be accepted by our family, friends, and colleagues. There are no good or bad jobs as long as you do not compromise your intergity and your authentic self while working that job or career.

What Makes a Job or Career?

YOU make a job or career! You make the difference! If you are doing a job that you find fulfilling, then that makes it good no matter what anyone else tells you. Teaching is a beautiful career, especially when someone is passionate about it. Every customer service job is essential to the function of our economy and day to day living.

When a service worker is giving 100 percent, he/she can make a person’s experience memorable. If someone hears a beautiful piece of music or watches a powerful film or play, it can have an impact on his/her life forever. When you show up and give the best of yourself, you will feel happier no matter what job or career you have.

Conclusion

I remember getting so much praise and appreciation from people in general for having a teaching career, which fed my longing for approval abundantly. If I wanted to keep up the people pleasing and the NYC teaching salary and benefits, I could have continued working in education.

I was chasing a check, caving in to familial and societal approval, compromising my integrity regularly, and neglecting my mental health on a daily basis. Your conscious knows when you are conforming, but you ignore it. We all know that there will be hard days at work no matter what job or career you have. But ask yourself: how do you show up to work each day? Are you just trying to get through the day every single day? Are you using any of your natural gifts? Do you know what your gifts are?

Find out as soon as possible if you do not know. Listen to your conscious or God or whatever you believe in. Tune out what the world is telling you. This is hard, but I believe in you. If we would become self-aware and be true to our authentic selves, I truly believe that we would all find contentment and peace within.

Book Suggestion: The Big Leap: https://www.goodreads.com/en/book/show/6391876

https://www.bydominiqueduarte.com/the-best-ways-to-find-a-job/

Hope this Helps

Dominique Duarte

Categories
Self-Help on Life

How To Live Your Life Walking in Your Purpose

Be Inspired Quotes - Seek Your Purpose. Without knowing your real purpose  of existence, you will be just like "zombies", the walking dead. Therefore,  seek your purpose of living. Learn how life

Walking in your purpose can be overwhelming, especially if you have not seen the fruit of your labor in the way you would like. Some people are still not sure about their purpose at all and that is okay. Just be patient and kind with yourself until you figure it out. If you do know your purpose, this post is mostly for you. You can do the following things to walk in your purpose with confidence no matter your current circumstances.

Book Suggestion: https://www.amazon.com/Genius-Zone-Breakthrough-Negative-Creativity/dp/B08PW4QGD5

Relevant: https://www.bydominiqueduarte.com/how-to-wait-patiently/

Persevere

When you are walking in your purpose, you will be knocked down. Some people think that if you are truly walking in your purpose that doors will just open and there will be no adversity at all. However, this is not the case. No matter what you do in life, there will be some level of adversity. If you know that you are walking in your purpose, then you have to persevere through the trials. Sometimes, you will fail multiple times, but please keep going on your journey. You got this!

Feel All of Your Feelings

“If you are knocked down, don’t stay down, get back up.” You probably hear this saying all the time and many interpret that as feel nothing along the way to getting back up. You will feel anger, sadness, joy, happiness, frustration and possibly some depression when walking in your purpose. Feeling your feelings is not a problem as long as you do not hurt anyone in the process. Instead of using food, drugs, alcohol, or cigarettes to numb your feelings, actually feel and process them. This will take time. Processing your emotions will give you the momentum to keep walking in your purpose.

Be Patient & Grateful

God works in His own timing or the universe works in its’ own timing, whichever you believe. However, it is challenging to believe this when waiting for your own ship to come in. Celebrate the small wins, ALL of them and be grateful for every single one. If you are grateful for the little things, then you will have a more positive outlook on your situation, even during the difficult periods.

The wins may be far and in between at times, but it is a part of the process. When God or the universe feels you are ready for more, He or it will open more doors, but every step that you take is preparing you for the bigger picture in the future. Be patient with yourself and know that you are worthy of greatness, and only you are meant to walk this particular path, so be diligent and grateful along the journey no matter how long it takes.

Conclusion

Persevere, feel all your feelings, be patient and grateful and you will continue to walk in your purpose with joy in your heart. Success is not immediate and it may not ever look the way you or other people thought that it would, but when your life has purpose, it is truly beautiful and worth all of the difficulties along the way.

Hope this Helps,

Dominique Duarte

Categories
Self-Help on Life

How to Manage Living Single in Life

35 Short Positive Attitude Quotes - Self Attitude Quotes

I just turned 33 last week and have been single my entire adolescence and adult life. There are times that it can be overwhelming to: track finances, pay the bills, make constant career decisions, submit for auditions and self-tapes, work, cook, grocery shop, work on my mental health and personal growth, do laundry, and handle life in general on my own. Living single is not for the faint of heart, but you can do it, if this is your situation. Here are some things that can ease the load of living single:

Write Everything Down

A journal, a planner, and to do list pads can be a single person’s best friends. The planner keeps track of everything that I have to do throughout the day, week, and year. Write down everything: appointments, work times, laundry days, workouts, tax time, even meals. This can give you a routine as well as keep track of various important dates and times.

Write consistent to-do lists and scratch off things as you go. It can give you a feeling of accomplishment to just get even the smallest things completed. Lastly, try keeping a journal to write your feelings and thoughts. Living alone can bring its own set of challenges, so journaling can be a constructive way to deal with those difficulties.

Reach Out to People

Yes, living single can be lonely, but you can reach out to people regularly. Most people will not reach out to you due to a multitude of valid reasons. I have learned that I have to reach out to people if I want a relationship, even a casual one. People love to get text messages that just ask how they are doing. Try texting at least one person a day!

Call and leave a fun voice message and make their day. For socializing, try to invite friends out a few times a month or find a meetup if you do not know anyone. You could also volunteer at a soup kitchen, or join a church, or organization. Find and create a small community so that you do not feel so isolated. You can also use dating apps to meet new people as well.

Limit Social Media

This can be a hard one. Social media can be a great tool for engaging with family and friends. However, I have taken a few breaks from Facebook over the years because I would often compare my life to other people’s lives. I want everyone to be successful and have all the happiness in the world.

But sometimes it is hard to see everyone else thrive when you are going through life with very little emotional support. If you limit social media, you can be more productive with other things, but most importantly, you will protect your mental health.

Cherish Your Time Alone

Being alone can be a blessing in its’ own way! It gives you time to be still, and just sit in silence. People do not often get time alone, so treasure the time you have right now. Learn about yourself, read personal development books, take walks, go to the movies, or take yourself out to dinner and a show.

Take a trip on your own and have fun by yourself. I think people are afraid of being alone, but it can give you a chance to be fully present with yourself and God. You will find your inner voice and learn how to listen to it without the noise of outside influences.

Conclusion

Living single in NYC has brought trials, but it has created so much personal growth as well. Writing everything down, reaching out to people, limiting social media, and cherishing my time alone have eased the burden of living single. Being alone can be a gift. Currently, I am gaining a stronger sense of myself and my identity. If you know who you are and whose you are, you can show up in the world as the best version of yourself.

Hope this helps,

Dominique Duarte

https://bydominiqueduarte.com/why-we-should-go-to-therapy/

Book Suggestion: https://5lovelanguages.com/store/the-5-love-languages-singles-edition

How do you Manage Life as a Single Person? Comment Below!

Categories
Work & Jobs

How to Be A Good Employee

Best Employee Of The Month Images – Browse 2,009 Stock Photos, Vectors, and  Video | Adobe Stock

In one week, I will turn the big 33! Woohoo! It is hard to believe that I have been an employee for 15 years already. I have had 35 jobs since I was 17, and I have never been let go from a job, except Campus Pizza in college. Of course, Campus Pizza was run my student managers, go figure! I have had several jobs over the years and have tried to be a good employee overall. Here is what I have learned over the years. Show up consistently, communicate with your employers, and be open to learning and growing.

Best Job Search Site: https://www.indeed.com/

The Best Ways to Find a Job: https://bydominiqueduarte.com/the-best-ways-to-find-a-job/

Show Up Consistently

This is a big one! I think most people get let go from a job because of attendance. This is the easiest thing you can do in any situation is to just SHOW UP. We all have sick days and this is totally understandable, but you must communicate this to your employer. Communicate anytime you are unable to come to work. Your boss will greatly appreciate it.

If you have to miss work or are running late, your employer is more understanding if you let them know ahead of time. Attendance led to my one and only firing at Campus Pizza in Murray. I had worked there for a little over a year on weekends. When I had performances that conflicted with my shift, I would try to get someone to cover for me.

However, there were times when I could not get anyone to cover my shift. Since I could not find anyone to cover one of my shifts, I got the boot for not being able to find coverage and then not showing up for the shift to perform in a musical. Basically, if you do not show up, it effects everyone else during the shift, no matter the reason. Show up and be on time.

Always Communicate to Your Employers

Communication is key and in the Campus Pizza situation, I should have asked for the student managers cell phone numbers in advance. I called the dining hall before the shift and no one answered the phone so I left a message. The student manager did not get the message, so it was considered a no call, no show. The student manager immediately sent a termination email without talking to me first.

She knew that I had been a reliable employee in the past, but no call, no show means immediate termination for most jobs. As far as communication goes, the situation with Campus Pizza is an anomaly for sure. Post college, I have always been able to contact my employers through email, text, or by phone. In 2022, there is no excuse to not contact your employer about your attendance. There are too many ways to contact your managers so take advantage of it. If you have any other concerns about anything job related, let your managers know in a professional manner.

Be Open to Learning & Growing

Learn as much as you can about your job. Go above and beyond, even at the simplest of jobs. When you continue to learn at your job, you gain more life skills, and it can make even the most mundane jobs more interesting. Always ask questions so that you can become as knowledgeable as possible about the ins and outs of the job.

One of my favorite jobs other than acting was working at Trader Joe’s. I loved bagging groceries and stocking the shelves since I love to organize things. Also, there were so many different tasks to do at Trader Joe’s, so it was never boring. There was always something new to learn.

Futhermore, working at Cracker Barrel helped me with my communication skills because I had to answer the phones and check out guests daily. I learned how to be interested in other people and ask open ended questions to get to know people better.

This is an essential life skill that I have used in all areas of my life. If you ask people open ended questions like” What did you do today?”, you will get most people to open up so quickly. Lastly, there will be changes at work sometimes, so become as informed as possible to continue doing your job efficiently with the changes.

Conclusion

So whether you just got a new job or have been working at your job for years, show up consistently, communicate with your employers, and be open to learning and growing. If you show up well at work, you will feel better about yourself than if you are just doing the bare minimum and barely showing up. Be the best you at all times.

Hope this helps,

Dominique Duarte

Categories
Self-Help on Life

How to Save Money on a Low Budget

Take money Images | Free Vectors, Stock Photos & PSD

Saving money can be difficult to say the least. When I wanted to save, I always wanted to put a big chunk of money in my savings. Due to my adult financial situation, those moments when I had a big chunk of money were infrequent. If you make a low amonut of money, here are some tips on how to save on a budget. In case of an emergency, it is best to save at least 5,000 dollars.

Put a Small Amount in Savings

Time passes so quickly and before you know it, 5 years have passed and you still have nothing in your savings. If you make a low income try putting 5 dollars, 10, dollars, or 20 dollars per paycheck into your savings consistently. This will add up gradually overtime. It is a small amount, but it is better than not saving anything at all year after year.

Track Your Spending

Adding up all of your bills is necessary so that you know how much is coming out of your account every month. Take a look at your bank statements and see where your money going. Ask yourself: “Is there anything that I can cut out of my monthly outcome?” Create a budget by writing out every single bill and what time of the month the bill comes out.

Then figure out how much you want to spend on food, tolietries, etc. For food and tolietries, etc, try using cash instead of a debit card. Seeing the money physically may help you stick to your budget better than constantly swiping your debit card.

Increase Your Income

You can get another job specifically to save money. The money from this job will only go into your savings account. You could also consider getting a higher paying full-time job. Research and apply, apply, apply. Remember that you have to apply for 50 to 100 jobs or more to get new employment. Indeed.com is an amazing resource for applying for jobs.

I have had so many jobs in my adult life and it takes several applications and interviews to gain employment. Research, research, research. Think outside of the box! There were jobs available that I had never even thought of applying for such as ushering at Jazz at Lincoln Center or catering at a temp agency. Consider side hustles like network marketing, blogging, teaching online, creating a youtube channel, working at a store or restaurant on weekends only.

Best Job Search Site: https://www.indeed.com/

https://bydominiqueduarte.com/the-best-ways-to-find-a-job/

Conclusion

You can save money! I believe in you! Put away a small amount in your savings per paycheck, track your monthly spending, consider increasing your income by getting a higher paying full-time job or getting a side hustle specifically for savings.

Saving has been a journey for me for sure. However, when your savings account increases, your stress can decrease. Emergencies happen and you want to be prepared financially when those moments come up in your life. Be Prepared!

Hope this helps,

Dominique Duarte

How do you save money? Comment below!

Categories
Self-Help on Life

How to Manage Life as a Late Bloomer

I'll tell you, there is nothing better in life than being a late bloomer. I  believe that success can happen… | Inspirational words, Inspirational  quotes, Cool words

In society, it is expected that you are established in your career, started a family, bought a home by 30. Here’s the thing, life does not go the way you think it will. I thought I would be an established actor on Broadway or an opera singer at the MET at this point in my life.

Life is unpredictable and I am a late bloomer in all areas of life. There is nothing wrong with being a late bloomer in your life. Life happens, so embrace your current life, count your blessings, know your why and narrow your focus to bloom into who you were meant to be in this world.

Embrace Your Current Life

It is not uncommon to gain traction in your career later in life. I wish this was emphasized more in American society. Most people do not have everything together by 30. Do not compare your chapter in life with the chapter of other people. This is easier said than done, especially with social media. Remember that we all have unique paths and journeys. There is a reason why you are where you are right now. Embrace where you are now and keep going.

Count Your Blessings

You can always improve your life, but be content where you are too. Embrace your current life and count your blessings. For example, today I remembered that I have lived in NYC for six years, and I have always had food to eat and a decent place to live. This is a blessing. Secondly, I am booking consistent acting work for the first time since I left Tennessee.

One of my goals this year was to get a survival job that pays the bills and gives me time to build my craft. This goal was manifested through Backstage, a site for acting jobs. My catering job came from that website in June and I am super grateful to God for it. Catering is flexible, amazing pay, and perfect for an actor. Find blessings in the small things in your life on the days when you feel weighed down by your current life.

Backstage: https://www.backstage.com/u/dominique-duarte/

Remember Your Why

It is so easy to get distracted and forget your dreams and goals. I have met several actors, musicians, and performers in NYC, but many of them are not actively auditioning so they are not booking work. Unfortunately, I became this person too.

People move here and become so preoccupied with working and surviving, that they no longer have adequate time to audition. Actors are unsuccessful because they quit auditioning. Remember your why! If you forget your why, you will lose focus and get distracted with jobs and hustles that have nothing to do with your dreams and goals. Write down your why and keep it close to you at all times.

Narrow Your Focus

Once you know your why, keep it simple. In the past, I would write sixteen to twenty yearly goals almost every year and post it on my wall. This was way too many, at least for me. I am going to focus my energy on four things for the next year. If you focus your energy in fewer areas then, you will not spread yourself too thin. Find a balance by narrowing your focus on a few things and be consistent with those few things to create permanent life changes.

Book Suggestion: https://www.amazon.com/Big-Leap-Conquer-Hidden-Level/dp/0061735361

Conclusion

Embrace your current life by counting your blessings and taking ownership of your personal growth. Remember your why and narrow your focus to conserve your energy to accomplish your dreams and goals. You will have a strong sense of yourself when you walk in your purpose and this will radiate light in the lives of others as well.

Furthermore, since you did take longer to become successful in your career, you will be more present and less likely to take opportunties for granted. Late-bloomer just means that your journey to success will take a little longer, but this gives you time to mature and become the best you that you can be.

Hope this helps,

Dominique Duarte

https://www.bydominiqueduarte.com/how-to-encourage-yourself/

Categories
Self-Help on Life

How to Achieve Your Goals in Life

Seven reasons why goal setting is critical to success

Do you have dreams? Do you have goals? Most of us have many goals and dreams, but year after year the goals never become reality. I have realized that for most people including myself, our dreams go unfulfilled because our goals are not clear and we are not taking consistent action to accomplish the goals. If you have goals and you want them to come to fruition, here are some tips to jump start your future.

Sort Your Goals into Different Categories

Separate your goals into multiple categories. For example, I used the following four categories for my goals: spiritual goals, mental/physical health goals, career goals, and family/friend relationship goals. You can choose whatever catergories that work best for you and your life.

I wrote all of my goals down and sorted them into each category. You could also write each category on a separate sheet of paper and think of goals for each category. Use whatever method works best for you.

Write the Actions Needed to Reach Each Goal

We all have dreams, some of us have goals, but taking actions to accomplish those goals and dreams is not always easy. Implement small changes in your current life if you want lasting change. Consistency is the key to success. Once you have written down all of your goals, write the actions you would need to take to accomplish each goal.

Ask yourself: “What would I need to do daily, weekly or monthly to make the goal a reality?” Write all of these actions on paper underneath each individual goal. Begin adding those actions into your daily, weekly, or monthly routines.

Post Goals Where You can See Them Daily

Writing your goals is essential to accomplishing them, but posting the goals where you can see them daily will give you the consistent reminder needed to bring them to life. I have posted goals on my wall since I graduated college and usually accomplish most of the goals on my wall every year.

I have never made a vision board, but these are very popular as well. Writing my goals on a poster board or chart paper has worked for me quite well over the years. But choose whatever method works for you to reach your goals. If a vision board is better for you, then create a vision board. However, you should still aim to write your goals down somewhere that you can see them daily.

Conclusion

Write your goals, sort them into different categories, place your goals somewhere that you see regularly, and take consistent actions toward those goals. These tips can catapult you to your dreams. If you consistently take action on each goal, you are on the right track. Will you always feel like taking those actions? No, you will not always feel like taking action, but it is necessary for long-term change. Be consistent in your daily actions to create change in your life.

Hope this helps,

Dominique Duarte

Book Suggestion: https://www.goodreads.com/en/book/show/6391876

https://bydominiqueduarte.com/how-to-walk-in-your-purpose/

What are your goals and what actions could you take to accomplish those goals? Comment below!